Grief Supporter Tip #10: This Isn’t About You.

Grief Relief Tip

When trying to comfort a friend or loved one in grief, it is helpful to remember that this experience is about the other person. It may not be the time to share what it was like when your grandparent/friend/dog/partner died. Too often that can lead to a comparison of loss which can be hurtful to the person grieving. Grief is not a contest. Now, it might make sense to share, only if they ask for input or suggestions, what helped you during grief. Also, please keep in mind that how the person in grief reacts is not about you, either. They might lash out in anger or frustration or sadness. Recognizing this can help you not to reciprocate a strong reaction. They are struggling with grief. Let them know that you are there for them, you see that they are angry/sad/hurting/etc. and offer to give them space for a bit. However, it also helps to remind them that you will be there for them when they are ready.

Please remember this is one suggestion for how to help support those in grief for the holidays. Please feel free to review more of our tips here. And, please always remember, you don’t have to journey alone…even as a supporter!

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